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Avoid the holiday blues this festive season

December 1, 2022 By Jessica Samuels Leave a Comment

Tips for Holiday Peace of Mind and Coping with Holiday Grief

The holiday season is meant to be a time of joy, celebration and for spending time with those we love. However, the festivities come with high expectations of perfection that many of us struggle to live up to. Many people experience feelings of isolation, financial strain or increased family conflict that can make this a very stressful time of year – making for possibly a very stressful time of year. And it’s even harder for those of us with poor mental health.

CMHA Kelowna suggests that some of the best ways to deal with added stress around the holiday season are common sense strategies. The key is to keep things simple, focus on what is important to you and, most importantly, remember to make your mental health a priority.

Tips for Holiday Peace of Mind:

Plan ahead. If you’re entertaining, use the “keep it simple” strategy. Try menus you can make ahead of time or at least partially prepare and freeze. Decorate, cook, shop, or do whatever’s on your list in advance. Then you can really relax and enjoy visiting friends, relatives and coworkers.
As much as possible, organize and delegate. Make a list and check it twice. Rather than one person cooking the whole family meal, invite guests to bring a dish. Kids can help with gift-wrapping, decorating, baking, or addressing or decorating cards.
Beware of overindulgence. Having a few too many glasses of eggnog or holiday spirits can initially lift your mood but then drop you lower than before. Also, too many sweets will probably make you feel lethargic and tired. Simple things like eating well, exercising regularly and getting a good night’s sleep are ways to maintain holiday peace of mind and the winter blues.
Stay within budget. Finances can be a huge source of stress for many people, especially during the holidays, and likely this year more so than others. Try putting family members and partners’ names in a hat and buy one gift for the person you draw; this can help reduce expenses and refocus energies on thoughtfulness, creativity and truly personal gifts. Encourage children to make gifts for friends and relatives so the focus is on giving rather than buying. Try to eliminate the unnecessary and stay within your budget. A call, a visit or a note to tell someone how important they are to you can be as touching as and more meaningful than a gift. You can also enjoy free activities like walking or driving around to look at holiday decorations, going window shopping, or making your own decorations or presents. Craigslist and swap events are great places to find inexpensive brand-new items, and excellent-condition used items (which is good for the environment too).
Remember what the holiday season is about for you. Make that your priority. This season is really about sharing, loving and time spent with family and loved ones. Develop your own meaningful family traditions that don’t have to cost a lot of money. Also, remember not to take things too seriously. Fun or silly things to do, games or movies that make you laugh, playing with pets, and time alone or with a partner are all good ways to reduce stress. Use this time of year to help regain perspective; watching children can help remind us of the simple things that can bring us joy.
Invite others. If you have few family or friends, reach out to neighbours. Find ways to spend the holidays with other people. If you’re part of a family gathering, invite someone you know is alone to your gathering.
Connection is key. For some, this time of year can be a time for joy, celebration and for spending times with loved ones. For others, it can be a time of feeling lonely and isolated – it is important to remember that this year is not always merry for everyone. We all understand how feelings of connection and belonging are so strongly tied to our mental health. This time of year is the perfect time to reconnect with your network. Find ways to safely spend time with others. Also, if you know that someone will be alone – invite them to take part. This will help you and them to feel better.
Remember the weather doesn’t help. Some people get the winter blues each year, and a much smaller number (2-3%) develop Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). Paying attention to nutrition, exercise and sleep and being careful with alcohol are also important if you have a history of depression. If your low mood carries on into the New Year and starts to affect your daily life, you should see your family doctor. There are free skills and coaching available to help overcome low mood or mild to moderate depression. If you think you need help, during the holiday season or anytime of the year – click here for some resources.
Learn stress-busting skills you can use year-round. If the holidays often get you down, you may struggle with stress, low mood and worry at other times of year. CMHA Kelowna’s Discovery College is for anyone and everyone who wants to gain the confidence to face life’s challenges. Our courses are created to support your well-being through learning. Each course is developed and delivered in collaboration with people who have knowledge and personal experience in each topic area. This means, at Discovery College you will experience an empowering learning environment where genuine people share knowledge and practical tools.

More Tips—Dealing with Holiday Grief

The holiday season can be especially rough for those of us who’ve lost someone close recently or who lost someone close at this time of the year. With all the messages of family togetherness and joy, the emptiness left behind when someone passes away is in harsh contrast to what society seems to “expect” us to feel. Below are some extra tips to help you or someone you know get through a potentially hard time:

Talking about the deceased person is okay. Your stress will only increase if the deceased person’s memory is allowed to become a landmine that everyone tiptoes around.
Things won’t be the same. It’s normal to feel at odds with yourself and family events when dealing with grief. Try not to hide away, but don’t feel guilty about setting limits on how many events you will attend.
Don’t let other people’s expectations dictate how your holiday will unfold. If you don’t feel like doing something this holiday season, don’t let others force you. If you do want to attend holiday functions, make sure you know your limits. Leave early, arrive late, drive alone—do whatever you need to do to help yourself.
Take care of yourself and seek support. Stress, depression and bodily neglect are not a great mix at any time of the year. Don’t forget to practice self-care and talk to your friends and family about how you feel. Also, many communities offer support groups for people who are grieving. Being around people who know what you’re going through can be very comforting.
Think about building some new traditions. Remember that it’s okay not to do what you traditionally do. Planning something totally different is not an insult to the memory of a loved one, and can be a positive way to ease some of the pressure. That said, one of the traditions may include planning a special time to celebrate the memories of the person who died. Some families develop creative rituals like decorating a miniature Christmas tree at the cemetery, donating money to a charity like CMHA, singing their favourite seasonal song, reciting a special prayer before the evening meal, or even just lighting a candle. Symbolic gestures like these can help families validate their feelings of sadness and overcome the guilt of enjoying special occasions.

What Really Works?

With the holiday season fast approaching, we can begin to experience the pressure of festive expectations. To help cope, please check out What Really Works? A mental health podcast for young people. In Episode 14, hosts Beki and Olivia chat about why the holiday season can be stressful and filled with tough emotions, especially this time of year. From grief to hardships, to our personal expectations of festivities, you’ll hear not only validation of why this time of the year can be difficult for some, but also what tools we can use to support ourselves.

Whether you’re excited about the festive season of feeling apprehensive about it, this episode will provide you with some great knowledge and techniques!

Foundry Kelowna celebrates five years of supporting youth and families.

November 1, 2022 By Jessica Samuels Leave a Comment

Kelowna, BC, November 1, 2022 – Foundry Kelowna, an integrated mental health clinic for youth aged 12-24 and their families, is celebrating five years of being in the community. Since opening its doors in 2017, more than 4,500 youth and 3,000 families have accessed mental health services at the centre.

Billed as a ‘proof of concept’, Kelowna was the second Foundry location to open in BC. The goal for the innovative model is to fundamentally change the way youth and their families’ access mental health care through an integrated approach with a focus on prevention and early intervention. Foundry Kelowna, operated by CMHA Kelowna, offers mental health and substance use counselling and supports, primary care, in addition to an array of social services such as access to housing, employment, income, and peer supports. Now, five years later, there are more than 20 Foundry locations open across the province.

Mike Gawliuk, CMHA Kelowna CEO says the demand for the services was almost immediate. “What initially sparked the journey of Foundry Kelowna, was the understanding that there was a gap in reaching young people with mild-to-moderate mental health challenges. We knew then that early intervention and prevention was key to supporting youth in our community.”
Gawliuk says the number of young people and their caregivers who are in need has increased with the onset of the pandemic. “At Foundry Kelowna, we adapted and expanded services in order to respond to the need during incredible uncertainty. Providing virtual services to youth and families during the pandemic was a mainstay for us in terms of continuing to offer help. 2021 also saw the launch of Foundry Kelowna’s Wellness on Wheels – a first of its kind mobile unit that travels to West Kelowna, Westbank First Nation, and Lake Country to offer services for young people in those communities.”

Collaboration and partnership have been cornerstones of the overall Foundry model. “No one agency can do it all,” adds Gawliuk. “By working together, agencies and service providers in the community have a better chance to make it easier for young people to access care and navigate systems. The pandemic made collaboration much more challenging and we are looking forward to finding better ways to support youth in our community. We are so grateful to our many partners over the years.

In 2017, the community caught the vision and really helped make Foundry Kelowna a reality through generous donations, service partnerships and simply daring to do things differently. We look forward to the many years of working together to support youth and families in our community.”

About Foundry Kelowna

Operated by CMHA Kelowna, Foundry Kelowna is an integrated youth and family clinic that unites partner organizations to provide coordinated services addressing the primary care, mental health, substance use, counselling and social service needs of youth 12-24 and their families. Foundry Kelowna supports young peoples’ well-being by intervening early so youth can find the help they need, when they need it. To learn more, please visit:
Foundry Kelowna.

Canadian Mental Health Association on Reconciliation and mental health

June 21, 2021 By Jessica Samuels Leave a Comment

Statement From CMHA Kelowna CEO

My heart aches over the discovery of the unmarked burial ground of 215 children in Kamloops on the site of a former residential school. It aches with the knowledge that there are so many more to be found and it aches with the knowledge that this has come as news to so many.

There is hope however, that this is a moment of transformation where we acknowledge that we can all do and be better. CMHA Kelowna stands by the Truth and Reconciliation calls to action published in 2015 and over the years our organization has taken steps, albeit small, to inform our own Indigenous cultural competency. This past year we prioritized this effort through the official forming of an Equity Diversity and Inclusion Committee that is dedicated to supporting a CMHA Kelowna that fosters the health and wellbeing of all people. We know it’s more than just committees. It’s in our actions. We’ve also embarked on additional Indigenous Cultural Training and used our platforms to raise Indigenous voices in our community. And, recognizing that we are part of a larger system of historical racism and oppression, we are forming new common practices throughout our organization and challenge and question every aspect of CMHA Kelowna and the institutions and systems we are part of. No matter how tough that can be.

This is a journey, not a destination where we get to tick a box. Because we know that, we are constantly challenging our selves to examine and then dismantle our own actions that allow colonial practices to continue. Because once we know better, we must do better.

Shelagh Turner, CEO, CMHA Kelowna

CMHA National Statement

The Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA) is deeply troubled by the findings of the remains of 215 children in unmarked and undocumented graves at a residential school in Kamloops, BC. We extend our deepest condolences to those who are grieving and for whom this news reawakens or compounds pain and trauma.

We acknowledge that as the largest and one of the oldest providers of community mental health services in Canada, CMHA must take responsibility and the steps needed to address the harmful ways in which our mental health system has upheld racist and colonial practices. We call on our health care system and decision-makers to heed the recommendations of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission (TRC) to support Indigenous communities’ calls to action on reconciliation, and particularly those in support of Indigenous mental health, healing, and well-being.

Canada’s Indigenous peoples have long known that many children died at the government and church-run residential schools that they were forced to attend. As the Truth and Reconciliation Commission has stated, residential schools, a product of Canada’s colonial policies, endangered the health and well-being of the children who attended them; the physical, psychological and spiritual violence, neglect and harm from the forced separation of families has caused pain that has been passed from generation to generation. The tragedy in Kamloops reflects the long history of racism, violence and cultural genocide towards Indigenous peoples that did not end with the closure of residential schools. It continues to this day. Every day, Indigenous people live the very real impacts of systemic racism and colonialism, which affect their mental health and well-being.

Residential schooling denied many Indigenous children and their families the experiences of positive parenting, worthy community leaders, and a positive sense of identity and self-worth, which have structured and contributed to the systemic discrimination faced by Indigenous communities today.[1] Intergenerational trauma is felt within communities in the disproportionately high rates of suicide, which impact Indigenous peoples at a rate three times higher than non-Indigenous Canadians.[2] Communities continue to contend with the grief and trauma of the loss of the thousands of missing and murdered Indigenous women and girls, pain which is compounded by government failures to take meaningful action to address this systemic violence and bring closure, justice and accountability for mourning families who still do not know what happened to their stolen sisters. Indigenous children continue to be overrepresented in Canada’s child welfare system despite the known mental health impacts of separating children from their families. Furthermore, the lack of access to clean water, health and mental health care, employment, education and safe housing are part of the daily psychological stresses and human rights violations experienced by many Indigenous communities in Canada.

CMHA fully supports the calls to action that the TRC published in its substantial 2015 report calling on the Government of Canada to advance its commitment to reconciliation.

To promote the well-being and mental health of Canada’s Indigenous peoples, the TRC recommended that the Government of Canada, and those in the health sector:

establish measurable goals, in consultation with Indigenous communities, to identify and close the gaps in health outcomes between Indigenous and non-Indigenous communities, and to publish annual progress reports and assess long-term trends, (with specific mental health indicators);
provide sustainable funding for existing and new Indigenous healing centres to address the physical, mental, emotional, spiritual harms caused by residential schools;
recognize the value of Indigenous healing practices and use them in the treatment of Indigenous patients;
increase the number of Indigenous professionals working in the health-care field, ensure the retention of Indigenous health-care providers in Indigenous communities, and provide cultural competency training for all healthcare professionals;[3]
take action on the calls to work with Indigenous communities to identify, document, maintain, commemorate, and protect residential school cemeteries, to provide the TRC with all records of the deaths of Indigenous children in residential schools, establish a National Residential School Student Death Register, and to respond to families’ wishes for appropriate commemoration ceremonies, markers, or reburials where requested.

In addition, the TRC report includes many other important calls to action in the areas of child welfare, land rights, education, language and cultural rights, justice and access to information about missing children and burials, all of which collectively contribute to healing and reconciliation and which impact and support the mental health and well-being of Canada’s Indigenous peoples.

There is much work to do to achieve these goals. CMHA has its own history of upholding racist and colonial practices that have had deep and lasting negative impacts on Indigenous people in Canada. The Canadian National Committee for Mental Hygiene, out of which CMHA and our modern mental health system developed, was rooted in colonial, racist and ableist health policies and failed to uphold the human rights of Indigenous children and their communities. We deeply regret this past and the harm it has caused Canada’s Indigenous peoples and know that there is still much work left to do to decolonize and apply an anti-oppression lens to our practices and policies within the mental health system today.

Across the CMHA federation, we will build on our existing work and set new standards that will support the recommendations of the TRC. Many CMHA branches, regions, and divisions across Canada have been engaging in meaningful partnerships with Indigenous organizations and leaders in the development and implementation of cultural programs and services, including land-based healing, supporting Indigenous-led mental health promotion within communities, valuing Indigenous healing practices and ways of working rooted in the principles of cultural safety and self-determination, and offering Indigenous cultural awareness training for staff members. There is still much work that we must do to ensure that we are supporting and advancing the goal of reconciliation.

In addition to our own commitment to advance reconciliation, CMHA calls on the Government of Canada to take immediate steps to work in partnership with Indigenous communities to act on the TRC’s recommendations.

For more information, please contact:

Katherine Janson
National Director of Communications
Canadian Mental Health Association
647-717-8674
[email protected]

[1] TRC, 135.

[2] https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/en/catalogue/99-011-X2019001

[3] http://trc.ca/assets/pdf/Calls_to_Action_English2.pdf